


Is This Too Cheesy?

by orphan_account



Series: 'Short', Sweet, & Simple [2]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe, Josh thinks pizza is an acceptable flirting technique, M/M, Mark is a good bro, Mark's POV, Tyler doesn't know how to talk to cute boys, spoiler: it is, the word pizza is said over 80 times
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-18
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-11-02 03:34:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10936131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Josh is a delivery boy who just wants to do his job.Tyler is a college student with a crush on his local pizza boy.Mark just wants his roommate to stop flirting with the pizza boy at 2AM so he can get some bloody pizza





	Is This Too Cheesy?

  
Mark would like to think he was a relatively chill human being. If friends came to him with problems, he would hand out advice, calm them, and move on with his life. If someone had beef with him, he'd move on. No fuss.

But Mark was not feeling very _chill_ right now. Why? It may have to do with the fact that it was 2AM, he had an essay due in his 8AM class tomorrow, and Tyler, an amazing dude and an even better roommate, was trying to hit on the pizza boy.

It was cute and all but Mark really wanted his pizza. And as much as he wanted to support Tyler's somewhat depressing love life he had an essay to bullshit and he needed cheesy goodness right now.

  
"Uh, do you like pizza?" Tyler asked, holding the box in his hands, staring at the pizza boy with lovesick eyes. Mark was going to puke.

The pizza boy - Josh, his name tag said - looked very confused about Tyler's question. _Same, dude. Same_. _What is going on_? "... yeah?"

"Here," Tyler said before shoving the pizza into his arms. _Wait what?_

"Dude," Josh looked lost. Probably wondering why the customer was giving him pizza. Mark was thinking the same thing. "This is your pizza."

  
_Good point, pizza boy_.

"I paid for it." Tyler nodded, but he didn't seem confident in his answer. _Ah, no actually. We paid 50/50, you little liar._ "And I want to give it to you."

"Uh, okay...?" Josh placed the pizza back into his delivery bag. _Umm, no._ That was Mark’s pizza. Mark needed that pizza. "Thanks, dude."

"No problem," Tyler said with a shy smile, as if he hadn't just handed away Mark’s dinner and the only thing holding his sanity together while writing this assignment. "Have a good night."

Mark realised he had the ability to speak and he really should have intervened earlier, but the interaction happened so fast and he was so tired, and, “Tyler, what did you just do with our pizza?”

“Uhh, gave it to the cute boy?” Tyler at least had the decency to look somewhat guilty. Unfortunately for Mark and Tyler, decency didn't bring back the pizza. So Mark would have to live a pizza-less night, and Tyler would have to live with a grumpy Mark.

Mark threw his hands back and walked to his room, mentally preparing himself for the hell document open on his laptop, still salty over Tyler's stupid flirting.

 

 

 

  
Mark was getting pizza this time. He was determined. He would watch guard and literally leap in at the first sign of Tyler giving away his pizza.

“You don't even know if you'll get the same person.” Mark commented, looking at Tyler from his place on the couch. An upside down Tyler due to the way Mark's neck was bent over the armrest.

“What if I request it,” Tyler muttered from his curled up position on the lounge room floor, the light from the laptop screen really accentuating his double chin. Downfalls of tucking your chin into your chest, but it was usually worth it for the comfort. “Is that creepy?”

“Yeah, kinda, dude.” Mark quickly cracked his neck, trying to get rid of the crick in it, “Also change my order to sausage

“Kinky,” Tyler said, voice distracted and lifeless as he scrolled through the website. “How would I even request it? ‘Can you please make the blue haired boy bring the pizza. The cute one.’”

“His name was Josh.”

He could hear the pause as Tyler stopped scrolling against the mousepad, nails no longer clicking against the metal. “How do you even know that?”

“It was on his name tag.” Mark shuffled a bit further down the couch, trying to get more comfortable. “Man, for someone with a crush, you did a terrible job of noticing details about said crush.”

“Shut up,” Great, now Tyler sounded like a three year old who didn't get his toy. _I'm sure pizza boy will find that very attractive_. “I was a bit distracted.”

“Oh, that's right,” Mark turned over onto his stomach, folding his arms against the armrest to pillow his head on, staring at Tyler's balled up form. Adopting a false falsetto, Mark said, “‘Oh my god, Mark. Wasn't the pizza boy so adorable. Oh my god, Mark, he was so pretty.’”

Tyler finally made eye contact with him, a frown on his face. He quickly looked around for something to throw at Mark, settling for a sock, the only thing closest to him on the floor. Pitifully, it fell back to the floor halfway through its journey to Mark, giving up before it reached the end.

 _Same_.

“Anyway,” Mark made sure to extend the vowels, just to further annoy Tyler. “Are you really going to request for Josh the pizza boy?”

A sigh left Tyler's body, sounding like it physically pained him to make the noise. “I don't know, man. Maybe I should just leave it up to fate. If he comes, it was meant to be.”

Mark giggled under his breath, “Heh, if he comes.”

“What are you? Twelve?” Tyler tried to sound annoyed, but the little laugh that broke his speech broke the illusion.

“Yeah, from a scale of one to ten.” Mark was bored, but too lazy to move from his spot. What a dilemma.

“Wow dude, real original. What terrible Internet forum did you steal that from?” Tyler settled on his back, pulling his laptop up to his chest, double chin turning into a triple chin. Mark pulled out his phone. “Anyway, I'm about to finish the order. Any last requests?”

“Uh, you got a coke, right?” Mark asked as he opened the camera app, zooming in a bit.

“Yeah, and some of those little brownie things.”

 _Perfect_ , he thought as he got a beautifully framed picture of Tyler's chins, slightly blurry from the distance. “Cool, that's basically it then.”

“Okay, and,” Tyler made a show of clicking the mouse pad, “Send. Pizza should be here in twenty.”

“Sweet,” he replied, opening the messenger app and selecting Tyler's contact, ignoring the previous conversation that popped up. He selected the top three photos that really captured the essence of Tyler's chins and talking face.

The phone binged and buzzed from its place near Tyler. He lazily let his head fall in its direction, groaning when realising it was out of reach. Tyler fruitlessly tried to grab it, fingertips just out of reach.

Mark laughed as Tyler stretched even further to grab the phone. “Just move your laptop and grab it, dude.”

“No, I can do this.” He said, stretching his foot to try and reach the loveseat, probably hoping to use it to push himself closer to the phone. Mark took another photo of Tyler spread out on the ground.

He let out an amused huff, “You're just making it harder for yourself.”

“‘You're just making it harder for yourself’,” Tyler mocked, scrunching up his face. “I've got this.”

With one little body twitch, Tyler's fingertips grazed the phone, pulling it closer. He let out a triumphant yell when it was fully grasped in his hand. He quickly unlocked it, and Mark could see him pull up the text conversation. He almost started crying from amusement as he watched Tyler's face fall from excitement to disappointment upon seeing the content of the message. “Oh screw you, dude.”

“No thanks.” Mark tried to get out through gasping breaths, “Screw the pizza dude instead.”

Tyler inhaled sharply, “Low blow, dude. Low blow.”

“Shit, sorry, man.” Mark felt slightly bad, but as a best friend, he had privileges. And one of those privileges was the right to tease him about crushes. Especially crushes on pizza boys. Pizza boys that Tyler couldn't talk to without making a fool of himself around.

It was one part terrifying and the other part entertaining to watch Tyler spring into a sitting position at the sound of the doorbell. He quickly grabbed his laptop and set it on the floor, racing over to his wallet on the counter.

Mark lazily pushed himself up from the couch to watch the soon to be train wreck of Tyler's flirting.

He kept his phone in hand as they made their way over to the front door, Tyler practically shaking with nervous energy and anticipation. He pulled open the door as Mark opened his phone, stealthily filming the interaction, because Tyler and cute boys was always an interesting mix.

Josh was standing there with drinks and desserts stacked on top of two pizza boxes, looking kind of excited. Maybe he also figured out that Tyler making a fool of himself was the highlight of a lifetime. “One supreme, brownies, a coke and one sausage pizza?”

“That's for Mark, umm, not me. The sausage.” Tyler seemed to realise how that sounded. “Wait, I wasn't trying to do the porno thing, y'know. Haha pizza delivery boy brings a sausage pizza.”

Josh paused, “I wasn't thinking that.”

“Oh”

Mark couldn't hold back his laughter anymore, literally choking on spit as he doubled over. “Oh my god, dude. You messed up big time.”

“I, uhhh.” Tyler looked like a wire had crossed in his mind, short circuiting and leaving an embarrassed mess. “Here's the money.”

Tyler moved like his hand was on autopilot, placing the money in Josh's free palm and taking the boxes from his other.

With complete sincerity, Tyler looked at Josh and said, “Let's never mention this again.” Before proceeding to slam the door in his face.

“Dude,” Mark cried, “That was a little much, wasn't it?”

“Mark, I think I reacted accordingly.” Tyler set the boxes down on the table. “If I had the money I would be booking a one way ticket to a small Canadian town if I could, just to avoid the embarrassment of seeing him again.”

“Sucks for you,” Mark gave him a pat on the shoulder, “We basically live off pizza. You'll be seeing him again.”

Was he a bad person for finding amusement in Tyler's pained noises?

 

 

  
Mark wanted pizza.

“Tyler, pass me your laptop.” He called from the floor, hooking his legs so his calves were on the couch seat.

There was a rattle as Tyler moved around the room. What he was doing? Mark didn't know nor care. “Get your own, lazy.”

“Can't, too far away.” He was pretty sure he left his laptop in his room, maybe on his bed?

Tyler sighed then walked to the other end of the lounge. Mark cheered when the laptop was held out to him, grabbing it and placing it against his thighs. He opened up the pizza website and started a new order. “I'm getting pizza. Since I'm ordering, you have to answer the door.”

“What?” He called, “No. No way. That isn't fair. What if it's Josh?”

“Then I guess you can apologise for slamming a door in his face,” Mark selected a pizza that was on special. College income meant that discounts were a blessing. “Although, I'm sure he forgives you seeing that you accidentally tipped him a twenty.”

Tyler just groaned, probably in pain over the memory of that significant money loss. It left him eating ramen noodles for the rest of the week. “Just get me a Hawaiian, I'm too broke to afford desserts this week. If I find out you've ordered sausage I'm throwing out your Xbox.”

“Mmkay,” Mark quickly added to the order, checking over his items before going to finalise the payment. A little box at the bottom of the page caught his eye.

‘Special requests’.

Mark could be the better person. He could leave the temptation alone. Or… he could make the night much more enjoyable by livening it up at a bit.

With a quick grin and speedy fingers, he typed in _tell me I'm pretty please_ , into the little box, clicking confirm before any hints of guilt could grow.

“Should be here in twenty, man.”

“Sweet,” Tyler did not sound happy about it, “I'll go prepare myself for humiliation and apologies.”

“I'm sure it won't be that bad.” _Oh, that's a lie_. This was going to be horrendous. Hilarious, but horrendous. Mark could already see Josh confusingly telling Tyler he's pretty, and Tyler's equally confused reaction.

Mark was a genius.

“Don't lie, it's gonna be awkward and uncomfortable for everyone involved.” Tyler had a point. It was going to be very awkward, what with Tyler ‘can't talk to cute guys’ Joseph and Josh ‘probably doesn't get paid enough to deal with this’ the pizza boy. Throw in Tyler's terrible attempts at seduction and it just creates a mess.

Luckily, Mark found joy in messes.“Not me.”

“Fine, everyone involved but you,” _So just Josh and Tyler, then_. Tyler's hand appeared in Mark's peripheral vision. “Now give me my laptop back. I don't trust you.”

“I'm not gonna go looking through your history, dude. I don't want to scar myself like that.”

“Shut up,” Tyler snatched the laptop from Mark's legs by the screen, hastily pulling it away from him. “You know I don't look at that kind of stuff.”

“Says Mr. ‘Sorry to hit on you like a porno’.” Mark pulled his legs of the couch and curled up on his side, cheek pressed into the carpet. “Your first train of thought was cringey porn as soon as you saw the pizza boy and a sausage pizza.”

Tyler sat on the floor next to Mark, legs pulled up to his chest, resting his face on his knees. Tyler pushed a finger against Mark’s cheek. “You're a bully.”

“I'm bored,” Mark bit at the air near Tyler's finger and then attempted a shrug, his foetal position on the floor stopping him from the full shoulder lifting effect. “There's a difference.”

“If you say so,” Tyler didn't sound like he believe Mark.

He let out a sigh, “So, are you gonna confess your undying love to pizza boy?”

“And you say you aren't a bully.” Tyler said with a huff. “I'm not going to scare the person who delivers our pizza, he's already suffered enough after last time. Plus, what if he sues us.”

Mark pushed himself up so he could rest his head on his palm, elbow propped against the floor. “I don't think he can sue us, man.”

“Okay, what if they refuse to give us pizza.” Tyler said, as if he had a horrifying revelation.

“That would be tragic. I think I would hate you forever.” Mark was genuinely terrified by the idea. Pizza was 80% of their diet. It was a requirement as a college student.

“What?” Tyler exclaimed, “Why?”

Mark looked at him like he was stupid. “Because your weird flirting would would be the reason we wouldn't get pizza.”

“True.”

They stayed on the floor in silence for a bit, thinking about a terrifying life without pizza. The silence was broken by the sound of the doorbell.

Tyler bolted up onto his feet and began to speed walk towards the counter and the loose bills on top of it before slowing. Most likely remembering how awkward the next five minutes are going to be after the last interaction. Mark pushed his way up onto his feet, following Tyler to the entryway, hiding slightly behind the wall, preparing himself for the mess that's about to happen.

Tyler opened the door, light hitting him from the outside hall, causing his face to scrunch up to protect his eyes.

“Uh, do you really want me to say it?” Was the first thing Josh said and Mark knew immediately that this was going to be beautiful. Josh looked flustered with his jittery leg and flushed face. Mark felt guilty for a second, remembering that this was another person and he was basically forcing him to compliment his roommate, but Josh didn't seem uncomfortable. Just nervous.

“Say what, dude?” Tyler's face on the other hand was the definition of confusion, pinched eyebrows and head cocked slightly to the left. Mark could feel a giggle building in his chest, anticipation and excitement running through him.

“The thing you requested.” Josh said, his face gaining some of the confusion Tyler's displayed. Mark had to press his lips together to stop the first sign of laughter. _He could not interrupt this_.

“I don't know what you're talking about.”

Josh sighs for a long second, bowing his head, cheeks blotchy and pink. Still looking at the ground, he mumbled, “You're pretty.”

“What?”

There went the first round of Mark's laughter. Tyler looked shellshocked, eyes wide and mouth open like he was a low budget actor.

Josh looked at him this time, voice a little stronger, “You're pretty.”

“Oh thanks,” Tyler said slowly, still not fully processing the situation, “You're pretty too.”

And that was the last straw. Mark couldn't stop the loud bark of laughter, chest shaking with each new giggle.

Tyler looked over at Mark, “What's so funny?”

“I can't believe he said that, dude. I didn't think he'd actually go through with it.” Okay, so maybe Mark was a bit of an asshole.

Josh was the one to answer Tyler's non verbal question, his whole facing saying _what are you talking about_?

“One of the requests was to tell you that you're pretty.” Josh seemed to find a bit more humour in the situation than Tyler judging by his smile, but there was still the lingering colour of embarrassment.

There was a pause, “... Mark.”

“Yeah, dude.”

“I'm going to murder you.” Mark almost believed it. Tyler did not look like he was messing around.

“Oh shit, son.” Was all he said before he ran back, further into the house and away from Tyler.

He heard the sound of pizza boxes trading hands, and a soft, “I am so sorry.” Before the solid thump of the door rang through the house. Trapping Mark. Maybe he could climb out the bathroom window and scale down the building?

Tyler slowly walked through the lounge room doorway, “I hate you so much.”

Mark couldn't hold in another round of giggles, “He called you pretty. Did your heart race? Are you going to swoon?”

Tyler dropped the pizzas onto the coffee table and settled onto the sofa. “You're a terrible human being and I hope you're happy with yourself.”

“Oh, so happy, dude. You have no idea.” He flipped open a lid of the pizza and revealed in the smell of cheese and grease.

“I'm stealing a slice of your pizza.”

Mark went to argue, he had paid for that pizza, then thought twice about it, “Fair enough.”

 

 

 

Mark could kind of admit once the awkward air left the two, Josh and Tyler were kind of cute. Their flirting was weird, don't get him wrong. But cute. Like animals with too big eyes.

This was the third pizza delivery since the Pretty incident - Mark still regretted not filming it - and Tyler had finally learnt how to talk to the pizza boy like a normal human being.

Mark felt like a proud father.

The only thing was, now that Tyler could talk to Josh, he didn't stop. Mark had been waiting by the front door for seven minutes now, waiting for Tyler to wrap up the conversation. Unfortunately, that didn't seem to be happening anytime soon.

“No, dude, I saw the promo for it the other day. It looks sick.”

 _Cool Tyler, I'm sure it'll be great. Why don't you ask him to watch it with you and then come inside with the pizza_. Honestly, Mark was genuinely worried that his pizza would be cold by the time they finished talking.

“Yeah, I mean I'll forever love the original, but I'm excited to see it.”

Mark was beginning to regret ever pushing Tyler to flirt with Josh. If he knew that encouraging Tyler would delay his pizza in the future, he never would have done it.

“Same, I mean it was basically my childhood.”

Mark had had enough.

Straightening up, he leaned around Tyler and grabbed one of the pizzas, quickly opening the lid to check that it was the right one. “This has been riveting, but I'm gonna take my pizza and go, boys.”

“Oh right,” Tyler seemed to remember that Mark existed, _that was nice of him_. “Well I hope you have fun with the rest of your deliveries.”

“You guys are the last one on my shift actually,” Josh said with a smile, tucking his delivery bag into the crook of his arm. “I've been officially of duty for the last five minutes.”

Tyler shuffled the box in his hands while Mark took out another slice of his pizza.

“Do you want a slice before you go?” Tyler asked. He opened the box like a briefcase full of money, directing the cheesy goodness towards Josh.

“Sure, that would be awesome,” pizza boy quickly snatched a piece and shoved the end in his mouth.

Mark sensing the end of the conversation, turned back to the heart of the house and made his way into the lounge room. He settled onto the couch and waited for Tyler to show up so they could resume whatever new season of The Real Housewives they had been watching.

Half his pizza had been consumed before he grew suspicious of Tyler's lack of appearance, it had to have been ten minutes since Mark had left them.

He wanted to check on them but a small part of Mark was worried that he would walk in on them making out in the foyer. But eventually curiosity won over him.

He poked his head around the corner of the entry room and saw the door slightly ajar. On his tiptoes, he creeped forward and peered through the door. The scene he saw really shouldn't surprise him as much as it did. _I mean what else would Tyler be doing besides sitting in the hallway eating pizza with the delivery boy playing Would You Rather_.

Mark really should stop questioning Tyler's seduction methods, it seemed to be working regardless.

His confusion over Tyler's flirting methods didn't stop Mark from teasing him when he walked back into the apartment an hour later.

 

 

 

  
“Dude, you gave us an extra pizza.” Tyler said as he held the pizza boxes.

Josh gave a quick nod, “I know.”

“Why?”

Mark didn't know why he was questioning free pizza. It was free pizza. You don't refuse that shit. “Thanks, man”

“No problem.” Josh replied. Mark liked Josh. He was chill. And apparently was giving them free pizza now.

Anyone who gave Mark free pizza was a cool dude in his books.

“You sure we can accept this?” Mark was about to hit Tyler if he questioned the free pizza again.

“Please do.” Josh shuffled on his spot at the threshold. “I can't really give it to anyone else.”

 _Well that's kind of suspicious_. But, Mark was not the type of person to turn down free food.

Tyler's frown eased a bit, “Okay, well thank you. For the pizza.”

For once Tyler was the first one to leave the doorway, lugging the three pizzas, desserts, and drinks inside, all stacked together like a hybrid game of Jenga.

“Hey, Mark.” Josh called his attention, “You think you could do me a favour?”

 _Okay, that's definitely suspicious_ , “Uhh, yeah dude. What do you need?”

Josh hurriedly spat out, “Could you film Tyler opening the extra pizza box?”

Slowly, Mark said, “Sure.”

“Cool,” Josh did a little bop on the spot, like a full body nod of his head.

“I, uhh, better hurry then.” Mark threw a thumb over his shoulder, “Before he opens it, y'know.”

“Yeah, cool. I'll leave that to you then.”

With that, he hurried off down the hall, tripping slightly over the raised carpet. _Strange_.

Quickly, Mark closed the door and walked over to Tyler who had already spread the boxes over the table and opened one. Mark whipped out his phone and opened the camera app, angling it so that Tyler's face and the pizza boxes where in frame.

The second box was kind of anticlimactic, just Tyler’s supreme pizza. The third box on the other hand was amazing. And Mark had it on camera.

Tyler opened the lid to reveal a pizza with a giant heart made of pepperoni in the centre. Mark hoped Tyler's little gasp was caught on camera as he saw the little pizza art, because it beautifully supported the emotion on Tyler's face. His cheeks went a little red as his eyes widened, his face becoming soft and awestruck.

Tyler then let out the softest “dude,” Mark had heard in his life. He was kind of impressed by how much emotion he could put behind a simple word.

“Well, I feel like it's safe to say your little crush isn't unrequited.” Mark said, not too loud so he didn't break the delicate air of the room.

“This is sick,”

Mark had to agree. He was kind of jealous. He wanted some pizza delivery person to crush on him and give him free, romantic pizza. Preferably a chick, but Mark couldn't really argue with free pizza on the line.

 

 

 

  
This was not the scene Mark expected when he walked into the pitch black kitchen at 1AM. He had flicked on the lights and almost had a heart attack when he saw Tyler.

“Tyler, dude.” Mark had asked, “What are you doing on the kitchen floor at one am in the dark with a tub of double choc icecream?”

“It's triple choc,” Tyler had mumbled.

“Is that really the most important thing right now?” Mark was worried, because late night ice cream eating in the dark was never a good sign.

So that's how he ended up on his kitchen floor at approximately 2AM comforting his roommate.

“What if he thinks I'm creepy? Like who hits on the pizza boy?” Tyler wailed, the spoon in his mouth muffling his words.

“Dude, he gave you a heart pizza. I think you don't have to worry about being creepy.” Mark was a good friend. He would even say he was an amazing friend. Why else would he be losing feeling in his ass to comfort his friend’s crush-breakdown?

Tyler was not a pretty sight. He had brown ice cream staining down his mouth and the front of his shirt as a result of eating in the dark. “What if he thinks it's a game?”

“He doesn't seem like that kind of person, man.” Mark wrapped an arm around Tyler's shoulder and squeezed. He didn't know if Tyler's lack of tears was a good sign or not. Mark looked on the bright side, _at least it's one less fluid to clean up_. “I'm sure if you ask him on a date or for his number, he'll agree.”

Tyler looked at him with hopeful eyes, “Yeah?”

“Yeah, dude. You're a catch. If I liked guys I'd date you.” _That's an acceptable reassurance, right_?

Well, it got a laugh out of Tyler, so good enough. “Thanks, man.”

“No problem,” Mark gave his shoulder another squeeze, “You know I'm always here for you.”

They ended up falling asleep on the kitchen floor, which wasn't too bad. The ice cream melted though, and attracted bugs, which Mark wasn't as happy about. But Tyler woke up the next day with a smile and new confidence, so he would consider it worth it.

 

 

“Okay, dude.” Mark rubbed Tyler's shoulders, “You got this. You're the man.”

“I got this, I'm the man.” Tyler repeated.

Realistically, Mark knows that they probably looked ridiculous. They were standing by the door, waiting for Josh to knock on the door with three pizzas, having ordered them late enough that they would be his last order. Tyler and Mark were standing across from each other in a huddled slouch as Mark gave him a pep talk. “All you gotta do is ask him for his number.”

Tyler furiously nodded, hyping himself up. “All I gotta do is ask him for his number.”

“And he's gonna say yes.”

Tyler pulled a face that didn't represent the confidence Mark wanted.

“Tyler, he's gonna say yes.”

He sighed, and started to repeat Mark again, “He's gonna say y-”

The doorbell cut him off, “Damn it. Mark, I'm not ready for this. He's gonna reject me, dude.”

Mark was having none of it, “Tyler, I will literally give you a hundred dollars if he says no. I am that confident he will say yes.”

“Shake on it,” Tyler said, a tad more confident than before.

Mark let out a sigh and gripped his outreached hand, “Fine. Now hurry up and answer the door.”

With a deep breath, Tyler opened the door and leaned against the frame, crossing his arms and letting out a shaky, “Hey, Josh.”

 _Subtle_.

“Hey, Tyler. Got your pizza.” He held up the pizza a little higher from where it was balanced on his right hand.

“Awesome, um do you want to watch me?” Tyler’s sentence came out fast and hurried.

“What?” Both Josh and Mark asked at the same time. _Tyler, dude. You don't just jump from first base to fourth base_. What was he even suggesting Josh to watch? Because if it was what Mark thought it was, he would need to have words with Tyler later about building up to things.

“Would you like to watch a movie with me?” Tyler said this time, which made a lot more sense.

“Ah, yeah that would be really cool, dude.” Josh smiled at Tyler and Mark immediately knew he was going to have so many ‘I told you so’ rights after this.

‘Mark, he actually likes me.’ _I told you so_.

‘Mark, he's actually going on a date with me.’ _I told you so_.

Mark tried to hold in a smug smile when he saw Tyler grab Josh's free hand and drag him in through the doorway.

Not wanting to be the third wheel, Mark grabbed his pizza from the table as soon as they set it down and scuttled away to his room.

He proceeded to spend the next four hours catching up on a tv show as his latest assignment sat on his bedside table. Mark was 98% sure it was looking at him. The guilt just further fuelled him on to keep watching his shows. Letting the assignment be out of sight and out of mind.

It hit 5AM and Mark could feel the dehydration slowly killing him, only having had pizza and some soda in the last eight hours.

He opened the door slowly to not upset it, not wanting it to creak and wake up Tyler. He probably had a late night talking to Josh.

As he walked down the hall he saw the lights of the TV painting the wall, switching between blocks of colour. So, Tyler fell asleep watching tv; poor Josh. That meant he had either left after Tyler crashed or they were both cuddling on the couch like sleepy children.

Mark pulled out his phone just in case he needed to take pictures of the two napping on each other. Plus, he needed to acquire blackmail material if Tyler was pulling an ugly sleeping face.

He tiptoed further down the hall and poked his head around the corner and _oh okay, they weren't sleeping_.

Nope.

No.

Nuh uh, that was not a nap.

That was his roommate straddling the pizza boy with his tongue down his throat. Okay. Right. Oh, and now he’s grinding down against him. And _no Tyler please keep your shirt on dude, no don't take Josh's shi-okay Josh's shirt is off_. This was mildly traumatising.

Most of his mind was regretting ever encouraging Tyler and his crush; maybe he wouldn't have to go therapy for this traumatising incident if he never pushed Tyler towards Josh. The other tiny part of his mind was cheering for his friend, going _get it, boy_.

Mark just made the executive decision to slowly back away from the scene of the crime and pretend that this never happened.

Getting into bed was an action fully fuelled by autopilot as he was still in a state of shock. Tomorrow he would wake up and congratulate his friend when Tyler told him the good news, and pretend he never saw them dry humping each other. Tonight, he would mentally bleach his brain. It would all be fine.

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you want a friend or to just talk about tøp hmu. I'm nice.
> 
> Tumblr: diddlydundidit  
> 


End file.
